Putting Resilience into Practice for Gifted & 2e Children, Adolescents, Adults, & Families

How we restore and maintain balance in our lives makes a difference.

The B.E.S.T. Model, created by Melissa Sornik, is designed to build healthy relationships by emphasizing four fundamental elements for cultivating resilience and healthy relationships. The model was created to address observed patterns of interaction that cause imbalance within systems such as families, in school setting, and professional settings. The elements of the B.E.S.T. Model inform all aspects of our work and can benefit clients regardless of age or setting. The elements of B.E.S.T. can be implemented with both neurotypical and neurodivergent individuals. It is the treatment model that supports the work of the clinical practice.

The Four Elements of the B.E.S.T. Model

1. Boundaries

What are boundaries, and why are they key to resilience and healthy relationships?

Well-defined boundaries provide privacy, responsibility, personal space, predictability, self-respect, mutual respect, and the notion of what is yours as opposed to what is others. We work with our clients to identify, establish and maintain adequate and appropriate boundaries in relationships, keeping in mind that boundary needs change over time, and will need to be adjusted. Effective communication supports this process.

2. Effective Communication

What is effective communication, and why is it important to develop and sustain positive, productive and healthy relationships?

Effective communication is the successful conveyance and reception of messages in a way that is mutually understood and results in an intended outcome. When effective communication is maintained, personal and professional relationships can be developed and strengthened. It also promotes opportunities for individuals to be seen and heard.

3. See the Person in Front of You

Why is it important “to see the person in front of you”, especially when they may be different than ourselves?

When we see the person in front of us as an individual, we recognize, consider, respect and honor the individuality of others, rather than engendering shame, anger, resentment and withdrawal. When we have difficulty acknowledging and appreciating differences in others, or if we come to believe that only one outcome is acceptable, it may be time to take a break.

4. Take a Break

Why is taking a break essential to maintaining healthy relationships?

Taking a break in relationships, by taking a breath and postponing the conversation until you are calm, is critical for protecting both individual and relationship well-being by promoting time for self-reflection, in turn allowing for personal growth and conflict resolution. It provides time to reflect on clear boundaries, think about effective communication strategies, and consider the person in front of you. This process offers individuals time and space to effectively improve their relationships and personal lives.

OUR APPROACH TO TREATMENT

  • Our practice provides a positive psychology-informed, strength-based approach to counseling, using techniques that incorporate research-based models including Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), Gestalt theory, Parts Work, Social Thinking (M.G. Winner) and Collaborative and Proactive Solutions (R. Greene). These are models that align with the B.E.S.T. approach to treatment.

  • An individualized "toolbox of strategies and skills" is vital for each client to address their needs. Along with the relationship-building skills outlined in B.E.S.T., clients are provided with additional tools to help them effectively meet their unique needs.  

  • Using Systems theory and the four foundations of B.E.S.T., we help clients understand and engage in the dynamic interrelations between individuals, families, institutions and societies.

  • The independent practitioners in our network are recognized for their expertise in working with neurodivergent clients, including those who are gifted and twice-exceptional. Our clinicians have presented numerous lectures, workshops and professional development trainings in their areas of expertise. Audiences include parent groups, educational professionals, private companies, and at local and national conferences. All practitioners who work with the practice are required to participate in weekly case conferences and/or direct supervision with Melissa Sornik.

“Gifted children with learning disabilities who are seen as defective, in constant need of remediation, come to view themselves with shame and doubt... But when those closest to them honor their strengths and believe in their ability to fulfill their dreams, they are able to mobilize their will to succeed against all odds.”
— Linda Silverman